What is the true meaning of the awakening of conscious me? What is essence-me really? And what is truth behind pure attention? The deeper we dive into it, the more we see how intricate and amazing it all is. It is like a quantum theory of our own existence, where we enter the inner world, the microcosm of our very me.
Essence-me, which we all experience as our ‘ordinary’ sense of me, is an external layer of the immanent I am through which I am can begin to exist as me. Essence-me is also the source of external attention, through which the immanent I am can experience creation and intelligence; it is the bridge between pure attention and external attention.
Who are we, immanent I am or essence-me? We are both – we are the immanent I am that exists as essence-me. The immanent I am is the core of our soul’s identity and also the source of the spirit of pure attention. And then what is pure me? It is the emanation of immanent I am into the transcendent I am, that awakens our universal individuality. Our universal individuality knows itself to be the subject to merging with the absolute reality. So it is because seekers are commonly not in touch with the immanent I am (in other words, are not in touch with true pure attention) that they cannot realize their pure me. Instead, they experience an expansion into an impersonal state, a state of emptiness or false consciousness without me.
How does the awakening of conscious me take place? Firstly, the intention to know itself as me must be born within the observer. This is the longing born from the ancient intuition that links us back to the immanent I am. Then, out of that intention, the self-conscious observer is using its ability to focus on itself in order to sense its presence independent from thoughts. Here, the observer is actually sensing the outer layer of essence-me as a certain concentration of identity. The next step requires the activation of pure attention, so that this sense of presence can be transformed into conscious me. For this to happen, the self-conscious observer has to relax so that it comes closer to the immanent I am. In this way, the initial distance between essence-me and immanent I am can be bridged by pure attention.
How is pure attention actually activated? The observer has to create an intention to feel itself so that its intelligence can spark the pure attention of immanent I am into action. So pure attention is not activated by turning attention back to itself; rather, it actually reaches forward from immanent I am into essence-me. This can happen only if essence-me relaxes into its own subjectivity, so that it can be felt by the pure attention which emanates from its core. This then allows essence-me to fall even closer to immanent I am, so that pure attention not only feels it, but embodies it.
At this point essence-me cannot surrender directly into the immanent I am. This can happen only at the very advanced stage of actualizing the primordial I. However, it can come close enough to immanent I am to be embodied by its emanation of pure attention. Here, essence-me is no longer just an expression of immanent I am: it begins to belong to it, it has entered the dimension of pure subjectivity.
So pure attention is not just an emanation of essence-me. It is an emanation of the immanent I am which is the very core of essence-me. Immanent I am is the identity of pure attention and pure attention is the spirit of immanent I am. Still, it is essence-me that activates the intention to initiate pure attention and gives direction to it, because essence-me is the center of intelligence of the immanent I am.
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